Review: Bermuda Island

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Bermuda Island
Directed by Adam Werth
Mahal Empire; FilmCore; Hosscat Production; Alien Donut Films;
Wicked Monkey Pictures; Stag Mountain Films
86 minutes, 2023
www.MahalEmpire.com

As subgenres go, I do not remember many that deal with the Bermuda Triangle, which is a shame. This one is sort of a cross between that and “Lost.” Perhaps the addition of a creature or more can be folded into that.

Starting off with a violent FBI drug raid on an upper-level drug dealer, Diego (Noel Gugliemi) in South Florida (I am guessing Miami), The film proper, after the violent prologue, picks up at the Miami International Airport, where we meet select passengers and crew heading for Puerto Rico, with said drug dealer in tow. They include a flight attendant played by Tom Sizemore, whose undone jacket and loose tie would actually never pass muster. But it is good to see him in what is essentially an extended cameo; Mahal Empire films are definitely helping to keeping him employed of late (e.g., 2022’s Night of the Tommyknockers). It is also amusing that two brothers on the flight are sir-named Sizemore. Noteworthy at this point is Carolyn (Mahal regular Sarah French, in such films as 2022’s Death Count), on her way to a vacation with her GFs. 

John Wells, Sarah French, Victor V. Gelsomino

There are other enjoyable stereotypes, such as a “Karen,” Peggy (Sheri Davis, also in Tommyknockers), and the comic relief of Midnight the Goth (Greg Tally, also in Tommyknockers; see a trend?), who was my favorite character.

It will come as no surprise that the plane goes down, though it is through a fun supernatural means (did I mention the Bermuda Triangle?), reminiscent of Airport 75 (1974). The survivors (future body count, and Mahal Empire films tend to have many) are stranded on Gillig… I mean the titular island in the North Atlantic Sea, rather than the island of Bermuda itself. Just an FYI, this was filmed in Vieques, Puerto Rico.

Greg Tally

Needless to say, those that lived through the plane crash are not the only ones on the island, as this is a creature feature, after all. Sure, there is one alpha male human, Bruce (John Wells) from a previous boat crash to take charge of survival tactics, helped by a member of the plane’s group, Damon (Victor V. Gelsomino, also in Tommyknockers); wouldn’t the plane’s Captain usually be technically in charge? Whatever, he is secondary character. However, it is the nighttime humanoid simian/reptile-like night feeders in loin cloths that are the ones to be feared the most. Their attacks are brutal, bloody, and give a good reason to show lots of gore.

There is also a somewhat subtle level of “Lord of the Flies” happening, with the plane remainders broken up into two groups, the main “heroes,” and one led by power-hungry – and armed – FBI agent Victor Sweden (Wesley Cannon). There is also a muscular macho masculinist bully who is narcissistic and rapacious (e.g., thinks he is god’s gift to women). He is what Bugs Bunny might refer to as a “bar-bell boy.” There are people you certainly hope to meet the monsters, as they are ones themselves internally, but others you hate to see go, and that is harder. What is nice is the killings seem random and just about anyone is up for supper for the monstoids (yeah, I made up the word, so what?). The attacks are also well spread throughout the film, but there are enough people left for the final confrontation at the end to ramp up the action.

Michael Madsen

The writing (screenplay by Robert Thompson from an idea by Michael and Sonny Mahal) has lots of twists and turns and a few good double-crosses. This is a film also about ego (e.g., the Karen and the Macho Man), and, of course, survival in an untenable position.

The creature effects, which remind me of a less-alien looking “Predator,” right down to the dreadlocks, look consistent and are well done. The blood and gore, which is in abundance, especially intestinal, are beautifully presented, without being too “clinical” (i.e., torture porn realistic), which makes this even more fun. While I am grateful for the nudity, it is also gratuitous and involves a romance that seems too quick and unrealistic. But I do understand why it is there, and have no complaints about it, as it is part of the action rather than just being there (e.g., a romance rather than a bath in a lagoon), even though it is there solely for the demographic who most likely will be viewing this release.

Mahal Empire films will occasionally give us human monsters, such as in Death Count, but more often than not it is some form of humanoid beastie, such as in Tommyknockers or Bridge of the Doomed (2022); There also are always strong and intelligent women as well as men, and really nasty of both, as well. I am quickly becoming a fan of their brand.

My big question is: where is Robert LaSardo?

IMDB listing HERE