Text © Richard
Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2020
Images from the Internet
Housewife
Alien vs. Gay Zombie
Directed by Andreas Samuelson
Zoombie Pictures
96 minutes, 2017
www.facebook.com/hagzfilm
Sometimes, ya need to make a focused, driven movie –
even if it’s a comedy – and bring home a message (even if it’s just joy). Other
times, you just gotta say fuck it. Horror films with a gay center seem to lean towards
the latter, and this Swedish (in English) release goes above and beyond; it
is camp from Campville.
This film, affectionately known as HAGZ
for short, is by far the silliest film I’ve seen since Australian sci-fi mash-up
SheBorg! (2016); but before you stop here, know that it was one of my
favorite films that I saw last year because of the sheer and utter WTF-ness
of it. So, keep reading…
 |
| Hector Lopez |
Newlywed couple Ken (Hector Lopez) and his
dick (pun not intended) of a platinum blond be-wigged partner Rob (director
Samuelson) have moved into a new house that is still full of the previous owner’s
possession, including an old and mysterious book. Hector is afraid because the
local legend is that the person before turned into a zombie (so why would you
move in? Oh, wait, logic… never mind).
That takes care of the “Gay Zombie” part;
as for the other, Catherine (Sanna Wallin), who dresses like she just stepped out
of an episode of “I Love Lucy,” is given the opportunity through a head in a
suitcase with glowing eyes (Elin Hallberg), to resurrect her dead sister Ruth
(Anna Walman), bad teeth and all, using some Alien DNA (musta gotten it from
Trump’s medical advisor), turning Ruth into a murderous alien-creature serial
killer.
And yet, the film has barely started. I’ve
already left out so much that has happened, including a ludicrous superhero
named Zebraman (Erik Nilsson) and a Dirty Harry type copper with a heart of
lead, Detective Sheridan (Anna Modén). It’s like there is (purposefully) 40 lbs.
of material in a 20 lbs. bag (or should that be kilos?). There is so much to
unpack!
The two titular main storylines are
separate at first and of course, at some point combine, though it feels
nominally, which actually works to the stories’ advantage. Would have been
interesting if the alien housewife were a lesbian, but there are other (non-alien)
sisters of Lesbos throughout, as well.
 |
| Anna Walman |
I don’t know if I would refer to this as a
“gay film,” but it is definitely at the core and there are some love scenes
(well, scenes of people having sex), but it certainly has a message, which I
believe is a good one: no matter who one is attracted to, there will be good people
and there will be the shits. But enough pontificating.
For me, as much as the action is fun, and
I will get to that, it’s the dialogue that really makes the film for me. It is
just dripping with puns, such as my favorite one when a criminal is captured
and someone says, “They’re giving him the chair,” as the cops give him a wooden
chair to sit on. This is worthy of Spaceballs (1987) and the line that
they’re “combing the desert.” It was quite often I found myself giving a loud,
verbal laugh.
Also, sometimes its not what is being said
but rather implied, such as when the Police Chief (who has huge, bushy eyebrows)
literally grumbles with non-words because it’s such a trope, really, who needs
them, right? The film liberally uses clichés to make it’s points, or just to
give a nod to other genre classics. For example, there’s the use of a talking plant
that’s reminiscent of The Little Shop of Horrors (1986), a refrigerator
scene that’s right out of Repo Man (1984), the sheer over-the-top drama
of telenovelas, a very quick dig at the found footage format of shaky cameras,
and even a wink at The Evil Dead (1981). One scene even makes fun of the
handyman scenario oft employed in gay – and straight – porn. Another stylist
choice is that, for most of the opus’ run time, there are added “scratches” to
the image to look like it was taken from an old negative.
 |
| Elin Hallberg, Sanna Wallin |
The cast is amazingly huge – did they use
all of Stockholm in this? – and the acting ranges are in the shrieking scale, or
what I call the Drag Queen Mating Call. The dialogue is either shouted or
grumbled, or in a John Lithgow sit-com reading (did he really win awards for
that overcooked ham-style in “Third Rock from the Sun”?). Most of the actors,
especially the key ones, wear some kind of hair accessories, be it wigs, the aforementioned
eyebrows, and generally ludicrous (I’m guessing Drag influenced) make-up. This
goes for the gore make-up as well: it’s a bit over the top, though a couple of
scenes are really nicely done, such as the last zombie attack.
In other words, there is absolutely no subtlety
to the humor here, just a cosmic, comedic sledgehammer, but it hurts so good. The funny bits are so
fast and furious, I may watch this again to see what I missed, because what I
did catch was effective and made me laugh. There is so much happening that
these are almost set pieces all strung together, but at the same time does not
lose the thread of the story in its own reflection.
Honestly, this film may not be for
everyone; if you’re homophobic because the Bible tells you so, if you don’t
like gratuitous violence, or you need a serious picture with a more linear narrative
step carefully. However, if you are like me and enjoy silliness for silliness sake,
and yet like a smart undertone with great references to genre films (drinking
game, perhaps?), then, as I did, you may enjoy the hell out of this and have a
good laugh.
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