Review: Mad Heidi

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Mad Heidi
Directed by Johannes Hartmann; Sandro Klopfstein
Swissploitation Films; A Film Company; SRF (Swiss Radio and Television); Raven Banner Entertainment
92 minutes, 2022 / 2023
www.madheidie.com
www.facebook.com/madheidimovie
www.instagram.com/madheidimovie/

Before there was Pippi Longstocking (1945), before Laura Ingalls (Little House on the Prairie, 1932), and previous to Anne Shirley (Anne of Green Gables, 1908), there was Heidi, first published in 1880 by Johanna Spyri. In this story, Heidi has gone from an innocent and yodeling 5-year-old mountain girl into a strong, angry 24-year-old woman. She is a badass.

From the moment I saw the trailer for Mad Heidi, I knew I wanted – perhaps needed – to see this. Filmed in Switzerland, this is apparently a new subgenre being referred to (by its producers) as Swissploitation. Gotta love it. Mostly in English, there is minimal Swiss German, as well.

Alice Lucy

So, this grindhouse release cannot – and should not – be taken seriously, as it is an extremely broad and violent comedy. Just what the doctor ordered. Films of this nature tend to be called “cheesy,” and in this case, it is quite purposeful, as I will explain later. The film goes out of its way to give it a 1980s release feel (a good start!), right down to the opening credits, and relying on a bunch of different genres throughout, some of which will be noted below in brackets.

Through the prologue and credits, we learn that Switzerland is taken over by Nazi-esque (right down to the Swiss Cross red armband) regime of President Meili (Casper Van Dien, of 1997’s Starship Troopers, sporting a comically-German accent) – aka, “Our Very Swiss Leader” – a cut-throat dystopian dictator who is not afraid to quash a protest through armaments. He also owns the only permissible cheese factory in the country, with the slogan, “Strength through Meili’s Cheese.” Any other brand is illegal, and burned, while the sellers are executed in the street. He is brutally aided by Kommandant Knorr (Max Rüdlinger) – sometimes the “K” is not silent – who says, as he is torturing someone in a dairy-related way, “I love the smell of cheese in the morning!”

Casper Van Dien

There is an interesting mix of Nazi-ism, and what is going on in the States right now. For example, there is a negative “other” branded on the lactose-intolerant who cannot eat cheese, reflecting what is going on with the LGBTQ+ and Trans communities. Republicanism is reflected a lot here, not to mention Meili’s tendency to wear all red clothing. His plan is to take over the world…cheese market.

Meanwhile, there is a grown-up Heidi (relative newcomer Alice Lucy), living in the Alps with her grandfather, Alpöhi (David Schofield). While Heidi seems to be unaware of what is going on in the village, gramps is more conscious. Part of Heidi’s distraction is her love interest [sexploitation], the godfather of illegal cheese, Goat Peter (Kal Matsena). He is pimpin’ his goat cheese in bricks in his white fur coat [blaxploitation] to underworldly figures. See, purposefully silly and smile worthy.

David Shofield

After some tragedies, our feisty heroine is arrested, and sent to a stern prison with Klara (Almar G. Sato), run by an even sterner warden, Fräulein Rottweiler (Katja Kolm) [women in prison] and her sadistic right hand who really enjoys giving a cattle prod, Lutz (Rebecca Dyson-Smith). In the Mengele-ish role is Dr. Schwitzgebel (Pascal Ulli), the Chief Cheese Scientist, out to rid the world of the lactose intolerant (reminiscent of Scott Atlas, Trump’s anti-vax COVID advisor). Naturally, the only food there is cheese (reminds me of a line said by Maude on “All in the Family”: “It’s Cream of Wheat and cheese; it’s light but it binds”). His goal is to form a “perfect” cheese to create a cheese army (think of zombies or Orcs).

Of course, after Heidi escapes and does some kung fu training, she becomes a warrior that is bound to influence a whole bunch of Halloween cosplay outfits. And rightfully so. I will not go into any detail about the fight to save Switzerland, but man, it is bloody and fun. And I mean some really nice albeit cartoonish gore that will have any gorehound cheering.

Max Rudinger

While there is a timeless feel to the film, such as “the new,” Goat Peter referring to Heidi as “Babygirl,” and “the old,” dial phones, it is definitely steeped in the ‘80s, with cassette boom boxes, mad scientist laboratories, explosions, bizarre opening animation and CGI, and everything being excessive.

The scenery is nothing short of stunning. Mountains, switchback roads with enormous drops, green valleys, bridges, and the like. So beautiful.

Kal Matsena

Goofy, but smart and obviously made by a group that are hardcore cinephiles, with influences and reflections of the likes of Scanners (1981), Cool Hand Luke (1967), High Anxiety (1977), the subgenre of The Big Bird Cage (1972), The Human Tornado (1976), Sergio Leone’s spaghetti westerns (including some of the score sounding like Ennio Morricone), Star Wars (1977), Crocodile Dundee (1986), Spartacus (1960), and, of course, The Sound of Music (1965). I am sure there are some I missed.

The acting is also reflective of the period it is honoring, with over-the-top dialogue infusing the over-emoting and facial expressions (Van Dien, especially and purposefully). Plus, there is one speech that sounds like it could have been pointed directly to the information deprived MAGA followers.

Katja Kolm

One of the notable aspects of this film is that it is completely independently funded, shot, and distributed. The contributor section of the acknowledgements is almost as long as the rest of the end credits.

Damn, this is a fun film. I highly recommend it to those who like ‘80s cinema, Tarantino, well-written action comedies, and just a need to let it all loose. Very satisfying from beginning to conclusion. Or is it not really the end of the story?

IMDB listing HERE