Text © Richard Gary / FFanzeen, 2018
Images from the Internet, unless
indicated
Trophy Heads
Produced and directed by Charles Band
Full Moon / MVD Video
87 minutes / 2014
In general, I don’t believe that genre
fan would really argue that the films from Full Moon Entertainment – and Charles
Bands’ in particular – are as cheesy as they come. This has been true since the
VCR revolution in the early 1980s. Silly scripts, sometimes questionable acting
and amateurish effects not only dominated throughout the Full Moon catalog, but
fuck, does Band know how to direct or
produce films that make all of that
work so well. The Puppet Master, Trancers and Subspecies series alone would be perfect examples, but then add in
the likes of Sorority Babes in the
Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama (1988), The Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of
Death (1989), and so many others; it’s not just a bunch of crazy films, but
rather a canon of so-bad-it’s-good cinema that every horror aficionado should know.
I’ll be honest with you, I’ve seen
most of the golden age Full Moon catalog from essentially the late ‘70s through
the early ‘90s (yes, on VHS), renting them with glee as they came out. Not all
of them were keen to me (e.g., Castle
Freak [1995], by one of my fave directors, Stewart Gordon, who… sorry, I’m
jumping the gun, so more on this later), but I would not miss out on my chances
to experience them because they were so
much fun. As I’m writing this, even more Full Moon films keep coming to
mind, such as Meridian (1990).
Adam Noble Roberts |
Anyway, I couldn’t help but smile and
digress at this point, so let’s get back to the film at hand. Like the first Scream (1996), this is an incredibly
self-referential a-nod’s-as-good-as-a-wink-to-a-blind-bat
release, with a half-dozen of the ‘80s and ‘90s Scream Queens [SQ] playing some version of themselves
in the present, being held captive by a basement-living nerd looney loser named
Max (Adam Noble Roberts), and his over-indulgent, enabling, and equally crazy
mom (the great Maria Olsen).
Max is concerned that the Queens of
the movies he loves (Full Moon features are mentioned and shown, of course,
such as Creepozoids; 1987) will be forgotten as they age, and insanely
feels it’s his personal mission to capture them, and mount their heads so they
will be forever remembered. Early on in the film, two of the SQ royalty get kidnapped: Linnea Quigley (here, Sister Quigley as she has bathed herself
in the blood of Christ), and the seriously intelligent and deep voiced Brinke
Stevens, as well as Lisa (Irena Murphy, who spends most of her time in the film
topless). They are caged in Max and Mom’s basement, as the actresses’ own
videos play, as well as the opening SQ’s death, Darcy DeMoss.
Michelle Bauer |
Max and Mom have the SQs recreate a
scene from one of their own films, no matter how poorly and inaccurate (a
comment on the original films’ lack of aptitude?) and then uses that as a means
to – err – immortalize them, in their own fashion. It’s actually weirdly and
effectively creepy in that it’s not the characters that “die,” but these fictionalized
versions of themselves. Some of the other SQs include the still lovely Michelle
Bauer (always one of my faves in my own fanboy days), Denice Duff and later-SQ,
Jacqueline Lovell.
These were the SQs of my youth, as it
were, and Band is wise to find a way get them not only to have some new
performances, but he also gets to promote his own Full Moon line, as most of
these SQs were in his films, such as Head
of the Family (1996) and some of the others mentioned above. Definitely a
win-win situation for all involved, I would hope. Even the smaller roles are up
and coming SQs in Full Moon flicks like the Evil
Bong franchise (I’m not making that up).
Yes, there are also some stunning prerequisite
cameos throughout the film. The one that will get a lot of notice is director
Stuart Gordon (Re-Animator [1985], From Beyond [1986]) who plays a
particularly obnoxious Harvey Weinstein-ish creepy version of himself (well, I hope it’s a version…), Carel Struycken (Lurch in the 1990’s Addams Family reboot) and the still
lovely Kristen DeBell (Alice in Wonderland:
An X-Rated Musical Fantasy from 1976; Meatballs
in 1979). Another Full Moon director of cult classics, David DeCoteau, has
a brief bit as well.
These versions of the cast come
across as humorously vain and often self-centered, be it unapologetically
self-motivated on one side of the spectrum, to overly religiously fanatical and
trying to share Jeebus with the world on the other. Now, I’ve actually had the
opportunity to meet some of them in my life (mostly at Chiller Theatre Cons;
see pics below), and they came across as friendly to both their fans and each
other. These cartoonish adaptations is more feeding to an audience who imagines
that they are like their characters, than what these actresses have brought to
the screen, not to mention a generation of teen boys.
Maria Olsen |
Max and his
mom are actually quite fun characters, and both actors fulfill their roles with
glee, which transfers to the screen. Both actors have just the right amount of
twitches and reactions that enhance the characters while both mocking them, and
making them somewhat pitiable. Max is as much a cartoon stereotype of a fanboy
as these SQs are to their on-screen personas as presented here. And it’s pretty
obvious that Max is not playing with a full deck, as he has quite intense conversations
with the post-decapitated and stuffed heads. And we hear not only them chide
Max, but have conversations with each other.
Oh, did I
happen to mention that this is a comedy? While I complained a bit about the
writing of the earlier fare, this one is actually quite smart while still being
just a bit goofy. It’s definitely a step up in that way, especially the
dialogue. There are definitely some serious moments, but even those can be
taken with a beer, if one is so inclined (I never drink…alcohol).
Each of the deaths is quite different
and shot well. And what’s more this is extremely entertaining, whether you’ve
seen the originals or not, or whether you’ve heard of the cast or not (though
shame on you if you haven’t learned your horror history).
There are some weird moments that
make no sense to me, such as Mom wearing white to drag a bloody body, or one SC
actually pushing Max, and then rather than fighting and taking away the weapon,
keeps on running. Yeah, this doesn’t make logic, but again, it’s a Full Moon
feature, so yaz takez what yaz getz,
and have fun with it.
Brinke Stevens (pic by RBF) |
One important thing that Full Moon
brought to the home market video is that they were among the first to add
“extras” to the ends of the VHS, usually in the form of a documentary called
the “Videozone.” It should come as no surprise and a pleasant reward that they
continue the trend with this film’s own “Videozone”; they even use the same
opening graffix (but the digital noise cleaned up and it’s been updated a bit).
For 10:16, this is an enjoyable Making Of featurette with most of the main
characters discussing working on the set, talks with the director, and with each
other. The 22-minute “Uncut Footage” is less interesting behind-the-shooting, including
rehearsals, and conversations among Band and some of the SQs, among others.
Linnea Quigley(pic by RBF) |
Next up is a “Submit Your Head”
feature shows what I believe are some of the backers’ heads treated the same
way as the SQs in the bloody, green frame for 2:52. Note that while they are
shown one by one here, they are presented in groups at the end of the feature.
Along with Audio Options (stereo and Dolby Surround), there are 8 trailers of
classic Full Moon features, many among those mentioned in the film, as well as
the one for this film.
Last up (though second on the list of
extras options) is the full length commentary, consisting of the director
Charles Band, and stars Brinke Stevens, Darcy DeMoss and Jacqueline Lowell.
Between them actually just watching the film, they definitely tell some great anecdotes
about their lives, the shoot, and little pieces of details that make the factoids
fun (such as info about a particular mask Max wears).
Michelle Bauer(pic by RBF) |
An argument could be made that the
victims are all Scream Queens and not
Kings, but let’s face it, yeah, it’s sexist as hell, but the these films in the
‘80s were geared towards horny teen boys who would obsess over the female rather than the male. I mean, during
the “Videozone” and commentary, Band consistently refers to these actresses as
“the girls,” which I found to be…uncomfortable. Good thing he made such an
enjoyable movie.
If the film feels episodic, it should
come as no surprise as this release started out as a 5-segment web series, but
it folds together quite well, and the fact that here are distinct acts works
for the film rather than against it, helping to keep the attention of the
viewer without having that jump cut feeling. While I may have my issues with
some of the gender aspects, as I said, the end result is an enjoyable and
well-written piece.
This movie is brilliant !
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