Review: Giantess Attack vs Mecha-Fembot!

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

This is the third and final giantess film in this series of reviews. It is the second part of a franchise, but can also be viewed as a standalone thanks to many flashbacks.

Once again, I do not believe there is any doubt that these films are absurdist comedies, thankfully going for the lowest bar and the biggest busts.

Giantess Attack vs Mecha-Fembot! (aka Giantess Attack 2)

Directed by Jeff Leroy
Full Moon Entertainment; MVD Visual
67 minutes, 2019 / 2022
www.FullMoonDirect.com
www.MVDVisual.com
www.facebook.com/WarOfTheGargantugirls/

This film is directed by Jeff Leroy, as a sequel to his Giantess Attack (2017), as explained in the prologue by a Katy Sagal imitator. Okay. I did not see the previous one, which is recapped through periodic flashbacks here and there, although I reviewed another film by Leroy, Predator World (2017). https://indiehorrorfilms.blogspot.com/2018/11/review-predator-world.html He also did the special effects for Attack of the 50 Foot Cam-Girl (2022) and Giantess Battle Attack (2022).

 

Tasha Tacosa, Rachel Riley

After tearing a city apart and eating numerous people in the previous release, once giantesses and now normal sized Diedre (Tasha Tacosa) and Frieda (Rachel Riley; both from 2022’s AmberRoad) are the subject of protests and lawsuits. Diedre is hiding out high in the mountains in her Fortress of Immeasurable Guilt (which has the house number 3 on the door) with Frieda trying to get her to join the real world (and, of course, catfighting…that’s the theme of the pic, after all). Meanwhile, alien-in-tight-vinyl Metaluna (Christine Nguyen, is shrinking people, such as a scientist, Dr. Drew (John Karyus).

Also fighting are two normal sized actors, Fran (Chelsea Bellas) and Amber (Kali Cook), after being offered roles by sleazy agent Joe Blowfeld (Ben Stobber, who played various creatures in a bunch of Mahal Empire films).

Finally, about three-quarters into this short feature, we finally meet the titular Mecha Fembot (Vlada Fox), under the evil control of Metaluna. She attacks Hollywood, and who comes to the rescue? Our two battling babes, Frieda and Diedre, who at least for a while are able to team up. Can they defeat Mega Fembot? Can they save the city? Can they show more cleavage?

Riley, Vlada Fox

Yes, this film is definitely geared towards a very specific demographic, essentially horny teen boys and horny older fanboys, but those especially with the catfight and macrophilia bug. Yes, there is certainly lots of cleavage and a surprising number of (clothed) crotch shots, thanks to “looking upward” at both our heroes and villains (no relation to the Beach Boys). Sexist as all hell? Yeah. Fun? Kinda. It is played so over the top, that it is nearly cartoonish, like some films that show violence that is unrealistic. However, the scene with Fran and Amber are kind of gratuitous and add nothing to the story, really; it is, however, another chance to show some more skin, another catfight, and a semi-macrophilia in reverse, as they are normal size, and the male in the scene is shrunk, giving that upward perspective anyway. Perhaps they are being set up to be more forward in another sequel? Amazingly, there is actually no nudity.

Nearly all of the film is either green screened (it is pretty obvious when it is) or using models of buildings that are easily collapsible. The humor in it is definitely grade school level, with a nod to the MCU and DCU, such as a nice running joke about becoming unrecognizable through a disguise of just eyeglasses. There is also a character in the coda named Nicky Fury (Alexandra Marie), who, of course, wears an eyepatch. The ending is a possible set-up for a new film, Giantess Attack in Space (although there is no listing for it is indicated in IMDB).

The extras are the trailer, and other Full Moon coming attractions. It may also be worthwhile to check out the documentary about the making of this film, Giant Women,Micro-Budget (2018). 

IMDB listing HERE

Review: Giantess Battle Attack

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

The second of three giantess reviews, this is the second of a two-film franchise, coming after Attack of the 50 Foot Centerfold (2022) As I have stated before, I do not believe there is any doubt that these films are absurdist comedies, thankfully going for the lowest bar and the biggest busts.

Giantess Battle Attack (aka Revenge of the 50 Foot Cam Girl)

Directed by Jim Wynorski
Full Moon Entertainment; MVD Visual
58 minutes, 2022
www.FullMoonDirect.com
www.MVDVisual.com

This sequel to Attack of the 50 Foot Cam-Girl begins in outer space, on the double planet of Buxomus, which is the “Planet of Girlgantuas.” Five seconds in, and I am already saying “really?” with a smile on my face. These films know their demographics to the T…or Double D.

These Girlgantuans (Buxomusites?) are warriors who, as we see right off, battle each other in MMA style. You know they will end up on Earth and meet up with giantess Beverly Wood (Ivy Smith) at some point, as it is in the title.

Led by the planet’s battle champion, Spa-zor (Kiersten Hall, who was also combative in 2019’s Kiss Kiss), aka Space Whore, the Girlgantuans head towards the land of the huge and home of the Wood.

Ivy Smith

Speaking of whom, things have changed quite a bit, though she is still 50 feet tall. However, Fuschia has reduced to normal size (seen only in expositional archival footage from the first release) and boyfriend Bradley (Eli Cirino, seen in a flashback cameo) is no longer involved when Beverly lost all her money in lawsuits due to the damage caused by her fight with Fuschia. Now she works demolition breaking rocks (with her feet), and has a new non-expanded boyfriend, Mike (Brian Gross, who also starred in director Wynorski’s 2012 Gila!), who owns the construction company.

Also back are the three scientists, Dr. Lana Rhodes (Lisa London, who gets to show more cleavage this time around), Dennis (Frankie Cullen), and Gary (Jaret Sacrey, shown in footage from the earlier film), the latter of whom is also reduced. A friend of Bradley’s, promoter Dennis (Frankie Cullen) however, has a fighter girlfriend, Anna Conda (multi-tattooed and septum-ringed Masuimi Max), who he wants to battle Beverly to gain fame and get rich.

There are some interesting twists and turns in the story as Spa-zor, Beverly and Anna finally get to meet up at the finale. I had a laugh when an oil rigs goes off and makes this the equivalent of another fetish, women fighting in an oil (or mud) pit. This gives Beverly the chance to say a line that should be repeated often: “Get off my planet, bitch!

Short and brief, the extras on this Blu-ray is the original trailer, and a collection of Full moon coming attractions (half the same as in the earlier film).

At one point in the film, during a particular jiggle-fest, director Wynorski breaks the third wall ala Woody Allen in What’s Up Tiger Lilly? (1966), to discuss the humorously gratuitousness of the “action.” However, it should be noted that most of the female actors here are actually quite accomplished in their own rights, be it as entrepreneurs, singers, influencers, and/or beauty queens – one was Miss Minnesota and Miss Bikini Model 1999/2000 – etc. Respect).

It would not surprise me if a third film in the series was forthcoming at some point.

IMDB listing HERE

Review: Attack of the 50 Foot Camgirl

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Attack of the 50-Foot Woman (1958)

Film one of three giantess reviews in a series: This and Giantess Battle Attack are a franchise. Giant women, for some men, is a fetish (macrophilia), as is watching women physically fight each other (catfight), and are something I will never really understand, though both are combined in all of these below. But whatever. Of course, giant women films have been around for a while, with the grandmother of all being Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958), but was revived with the likes of Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman (1993) Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfolds (1995), and Attack of the 50 Foot Cheerleader (2012).I do not believe there is any doubt that these films are absurdist comedies, thankfully going for the lowest bar and the biggest busts.

Attack of the 50 Foot Camgirl

Directed by Jim Wynorski
Full Moon Entertainment; MVD Visual
61 minutes, 2022
www.FullMoonDirect.com
www.MVDVisual.com

The titular protagonist in this film is egocentric and narcissistic (is that redundant?) super successful social media influencer, probably on sites like OnlyFan, Beverly Wood (newcomer Ivy Smith). She is nasty and will not listen to advice, thinking she knows best at all times: “I’m a self-made visionary,” she states early on. Obviously, the name is a mix of Beverly Hills and Hollywood. The other two main characters are her husband, Bradley (naturally tall Eli Cirino) and their jealous assistant, Fuschia [sic] (Christine Nguyen, aka adult star Jennifer Lee), who wants to replace Beverly.

Ivy Smith, Eli Cirino

We basically meet Beverly as she is filmed taking a shower (naked) while being filmed and endorsing some product. The power structure of the three comes into play pretty quickly, as this is not a long film, and obviously they want to get over the exposition quickly so they can jump to the giantess aspect.

Of course, as I have stated earlier, this is a – er – broad comedy, some of it pretty subtle, such as Beverly referring to sex as “getting unfiltered with you,” and hashtags appearing occasionally as subtitles, e.g., “#sad” appearing to express her emotion.

And how does she get to go from influencer to giantess? Thanks to untested experimental grown-in-the-lab “Unholy Meat-ramony,” supplied by a trio of scientists: Dr. Lana Rhodes (Lisa London, a regular in films from CineRidge Entertainment, such as Love Crime in 2022, and The Wrong Sarah in 2021), Dennis (Frankie Cullen), and Gary (scene stealer Jaret Sacrey). The Bevster eats the food – despite being warned – and achieves the film’s title.

Because of the ridiculousness of the story (not meant as a dis), there is a lot that needs to be just accepted, such as everyone not freaking out about Beverly’s new – er – stature; though I am happy to say that they explain her clothing, rather than doing a “Gilligan’s Island” wardrobe mystery.

I laughed out loud (#lol) when Beverly destroys a billboard with a Full Moon theme (blink and you will miss it). And then, what happens when, in a jealous fit, Fuschia eats some of the GMO food stuff and grows to meet Beverly’s height? Of course, girl fight. Why is it when giantesses fight, they do it in slo mo?

Christine Nguyen, Smith

I liked that there is a couple of references to the original Attack of the 50 Foot Woman. That was a nice homage, but you would have to have seen the original to get it (I grew up watching it on “Chiller Theater” on WPIX in New York).

There is some nice use of both CGI (naturally), and some really fine model making (by Jeff Leroy, the director of 2022’s Giantess Attack vs. Mega-Fembot) for the buildings being destroyed, though obviously shells.

The extras are the Full Moon staple “Videozone” (7 min),where Wynorski, Ivy, and Full Moon’s Charles Band sit around the set’s pool and discuss the movie, filmed before the release because they were still unsure if it was going to be 50 feet or 60 feet. The “Behind the Scenes” (6 min) featurette is separate interviews with the three leads, a couple of backstage shots, and mostly clips from the film. Also included is the trailer for Wynorski/Full Moon’s film Bigfoot or Bust (2022), a cleavage extravaganza of big busted alien women in search of said Sasquatch. There are also a number of other Full Moon trailers.

IMDB listing HERE

Review: Planet Zee

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Planet Zee
Directed by Zetkin Yikilmis
Yikilmis Filmproduktion; Digital Media Rights; Midnight Pulp; Darkside Releasing
96 minutes, 2021
www.facebook.com/planetzee1

Recently I reviewed Zetkin Yikilmis’s twisted fairy tale of the supernatural and violence, Pink Rabbit (2022), which is also based on a kill-or-be-killed supernatural scenario. This inspired me to check out this earlier film of hers; both are available for free on TubiTV.

This film is out of Germany, written and directed by a woman from Turkey, and filmed in English. Needless to say, some of the characters are quite accented, so I recommend using the English subtitles, just to make it easier. Personally, I like to do that anyway, as much as possible. Seeing so many live bands in clubs with no ear protection has had its toll, though I would not change my experiences. But I digress…

Zetkin Yikilmis

One would think offhand that the title would indicate this is a film about zombies, but no, Zee is actually the name of the lead character (Yikilmis). Zee is an indie filmmaker who is in the middle of making a slasher flick, while she lives with here elderly-but-nice granny, Sam (Trish Osmond), who is my favorite character in the story. While Zee is anxious about her filmmaking future, Sam gives a solid feminist standpoint to encourage her: “Never give up and know your own strength.” Yay. And you know that advice, much like Peter Parker’s uncle in Spiderman, will come in handy at some time in the film.

Within this film, Zee is writing a script titled Blue Smoke and a Locker. Amusingly, in 2019, Yikilmis directed and wrote Some Smoke and a Red Locker (which I have not seen). That is so cool and a great reflectionary inside joke. Note that this film was written by Bernd Strack, who was the screenwriter for Bunker of the Dead (2015).

Yikilmis and Trish Osmond

Zee is a heavy pot smoker, which amusingly is “dogwhistled” in the IMDB description as her being a “hippie.” Anyway, her producer is Serge (Alexander Tsypilev), an annoying sexually predatory twit who is just dripping in misogyny and toxic masculinity, but hopefully Serge has a comeuppance, because his gold chain indicates he imagines himself more the player than in reality. He is the kind of guy who gives us nice guys a bad rep. His attitude does not help when Zee’s computer is infected by a contest called “The Game of Power,” which claims it will improve “self-esteem” by forcing the user to do “diabolic tasks.” In her own “macho” momentary stance – despite the computer warning it is a matter of kill or be killed – Zee and Serge, who proves to be a coward, naturally, perform a blood ritual and are trapped in a room in Zee’s abode.

At about halfway through, the action finally starts in earnest when a demon shows up (Roland Bialke, a German professional wrestler who was also the titular Pink Rabbit in Yikilmis’s next feature). The make-up is kind of humorous; it is even commented on in the story (see the trailer, below), which I thoroughly enjoyed. The big question is, who will be the last person standing, and gets to leave the room? If anyone…

Alexander Tsypilev and Yikilmis 

So much of the story takes place in a single, small room, that has a strong yellowish ‘60s-‘70s motif (maybe that’s why they said “hippie”?), implying to the budget. Luckily, it is effective. Yikilmis seems to like small, confined spaces in what I have seen of her output. I say, make every dollar count. I respect that.

Another thing I found amusing was the subliminal anarchy hidden beneath the nonsense words scrolling on a computer screen (yes, I am the kind of guy who pauses the screen to read even the absurd words; I also do this when there is a bookcase behind the character, to see if I can make out any of the books; but again, I digress…), such as “Capitalism” and “Revolution.” I do not know if this was intentional, but I am hoping it was.

Paranoia and insanity, as well as anger close in on the couple as they continue to be stuck in this one space. Cabin Fever, or possibly something more sinister than that? Well, there is a demon…

Roland Bialke

The film could use some editing to cut it down to an even 90 minutes, such as a gratuitous dance sequence near the beginning that does nothing to advance the storyline. However, I am happy to say that the ending has a really nice twist that I did not see coming.

The acting here is, well, pretty wooden, but for some reason, that’s part of the charm of the whole thing. Yeah, it is not scary in any way, but the story is fun and there are some really nice moments of humor, as well as some gore (my favorite moment was probably unplanned but is so effective, when some brain matter gets stuck to Zee’s hair). The body SFX are practical, and range from cheesy to good, yet the digital effects (lightening, fire, etc.), look obvious and weird. But in this film, it works, because this was never intended to be Shakespeare, or Spielberg. This is what it is: independent, low-budget filmmaking, which, for all its faults, still manages to tell a fun story around the mishigas.

IMDB listing HERE

Review: Shingles the Movie

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Shingles the Movie
Directed by Steve Rudzinski
Silver Spotlight Films
117 minutes, 2023
ShinglesTheMovie.com

Let’s get the business stuff out of the way: this is an anthology film based on the Shingles books by Authors and Dragons, with A&D’s permission and financing. As the director, Steve Rudzinski has stated elsewhere, “It’s silly, has five stories, has plenty of practical effects, and I feel has a feeling of ‘90s horror book nostalgia, while still feeling new.” While I am totally ignorant of the books, which seem to be adult versions of the model of the Young Adult Goosebumps franchise, I am looking forward to seeing this, having been a fan of Rudzinski for years, and having reviewed nearly all his films (just search the blog). Let us dive in, shall we?

It is important to know that this is not only a comedic collection, but it is also totally tongue-in-cheek, being snarky, and purposefully and winkingly self-acknowledgedly overdone (I much prefer it occurring for a reason, than just being that way unintentionally). Starting off the fray is “The Legend of Jimmy Headshot.” Jimmy (Ian Sunny) is a teen -and a bit of a dick – who is excited for the zombie apocalypse to put his video game skills to work.

He poo-poos on his parents who went to college, though they are the ones both housing and feeding him. Jimbo heads out with skateboarding gear on, and a razor sharp hockey stick with a buzz saw frame on the other end. His aim is to rekill the killed. He is also armed with an enormous ego, as videogame prowess comes in contact with the real world of flesheaters. But can his imagined life keep up with the real deal?

Wisely, this story leads to the actual wraparound, of a group sitting in front of a fire telling stories in the parking lot of the Hello Titty Sex Shop Emporium (shades of Giuliani!). In this group, Buick (Jenny Hopps) has the best lines. This leads to the second story, “Put Your Hand in My Ass.” Stand-up wannabe man-child Will (Ben Dietels, a Rudzinski regular, who also directed Slaughter Drive in 2017), who cares about dental hygiene, is trying to figure out a new gimmick to become successful. His father (Michael Atrata) presents him with a ventriloquist dummy (that looks a lot like Jerry Mahoney…look it up) named Sloppy (voiced, of course, by Steve Rimpici, who voiced Duke in the CarousHELL franchise), that once belonged to his vaudevillian great-grandfather. You don’t need to look past “The Twilight Zone” episode “The Dummy” (1962) or the film Magic (1978) to know that Sloppy will have a mind of his own. And what a sexually perverted mind it is! This Faustian Bargain (similar to 1986’s Little Shop of Horrors) is accepted by Will, who does not see the big picture from Sloppy’s hidden agenda. And what is that agenda? Watch the film and find out. What, do you expect me to do your homework for you? Hunh!?

Sloppy

Sorry, my bad. Anyhoo, there is a humorous cameo by the director, cosplay artist (in real life, if that isn’t an oxymoron) Rudzinski, as a failing stand-up; his cat Gizmo, star of the Meowy franchise, also has a cameo in the film. One thing I find interesting is while Sloppy is unaware of non-misogynistic or racist humor, as “blackface” was popular when he was active in Vaudeville, he seems to know stuff about Chuck E. Cheese and cell phones. Suspension of disbelief, yes, I know.

The next fire pit story is by Darnell (Jake Moon), “Aliens Wrecked My Kegger,” regarding his adopted brother Clyde (again, Rudzinski) at college. Seems they are preparing for the fraternity Omicron Phi’s yearly blowout, the Beerlympics. Unfortunately, it is timed just when there is an intergalactic invasion. In the words of Cenk Uygur, “Of course!”

Dusty

What is especially amusing is that aliens Charpo (Blake O’Donnell) and Zip Zip (Jessa Flux) come in disguise to what they perceive Americans are like, via watching right wing media. Their hats might as well say MAGA. And personally, I am not impartial to the idea of these types being from another planet. They are led by the commander alien, Bloog (Amanda Anne Leight) I guessed where this ended up, though I would like to say that Clyde’s buddy Smasher (Paul “Pretty Boy Smooth” Bilbo), again, steals the scenes he is in; impressive job.

The next tale, told by not-so-bright yahoo Buick (yay!), “Just Say Gnome,” again about a sentient non-human. This time, it is Dusty (voiced by prolific screenwriter Michael Varrati, e.g., 2014’s The Sins of Dracula), a garden gnome that shits cocaine (in my mind, I just saw the crowds from clubs in the ‘70s raise their heads in a “saywhat?”), thanks to a witch, Madame Wanda (also Flux, who supplies the film with its only topless scene).

Jessa Flux and Dusty

Being that Buick’s family are racist drug dealers, Buick comes looking to sell some to Mrs. Black (Rebecca Reinhart). Like the story with the sentient dummy, Dusty talks Buick into making a deal where he runs the biz, and she’s there to be “the face of the operation.” Thanks to murderous Dusty, we get to see some quite well done gore. And if you blink, you might miss another cameo by the director.

For the finale, we meet the person everyone around the fire was waiting for, Godot…I mean Scout Leader Gary (Michael Smyth) – remember, this is adult versions of Young Adult novels – along with some new buddies (Aleen Isley and Gina D’Inacau), but things are not what they appear to be, of course, leading into the last tale, “Zombies Ate My Homework.” The action level goes up even more for our firepit group as they fight against (again) zombies which leads to more gore (by Cody Ruch). Where the storytellers are camped comes into play, as well (not to mention a hilarious Rudzinski cameo – make sure you pause it to read it).

There is a lot of self-referential moments that are played for laughs quite effectively, such as one character acknowledging “We are too old to be playing teenagers.” I had to pause the film to laugh at that. Then others say things like, “These jokes are for sick fucks,” and “That sounds totally vague and reasonable!” The hits keep on a-comin’.

Shot in Widescreen and 4K, this is actually a very satisfying release, as goofy as it is; and it is. Usually, I balk at a movie of this length, but here it flies by, with little wasted moments. One of the funniest horror films I have seen in a while. And be sure to stick around for after the credits.

IMDB listing TBD.

Review: The Long Dark Trail

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

The Long Dark Trail

Directed by Kevin Ignatius; Nick Psinakis
Four Eighteen Films; El Jean Pictures; Cleopatra Entertainment; MVD Visual
78 minutes, 2022
www.Cleopatra-Entertainment.com
www.MVDVisual.com

More than just “Acts,” this appears to be two different films strung together into one story. It is an interesting idea, to say the least.

The backbone of the tale is teen brothers Jacob and the older Henry (the O’Donnell siblings, Brady and Carter, respectively). Stuck in poverty with their abusive alcoholic father, Duane (Michael Thyer), they all live in a one-room cabin in the middle of the woods in Northwestern Pennsylvania, isolated from anyone. In the pre-credits prologue, like the real-life Menendez brothers, they take actions to break away, leaving on their bicycles.

Brady O'Donnell and Carter O'Donnell

The brothers set off to Pithole City (yes, it is a real place; many towns in PA have odd names) to find their mom, Hannah (Trina Campbell), long gone due to Duane’s abuse. The first part of the film is their “coming of age” travels, a quest theme that is classical. There has been, and rightfully so, a comparison with Stand By Me (1986).

Broken up into numerous chapters, we follow the brothers as they obtain (steal) supplies and travel through various landscapes on their journey, from the natural like rocks and woods (filmed in Warren County, in the Allegheny National Forest), to man-made like rusted metal graveyards. The scenery is interesting in its ever-changing views. Through it all, Jacob keeps having supernatural visions, such as a reflection in a river smiling back at him (it is in the trailer).

For the most part, there are a lot of tense moments, such as ultra-violent flashbacks of daddy, but generally it starts as a very slow burn as we get to know the brothers and experience their lives through their eyes. And the occasional dream. The words haunting and moody come to mind in the first section, but that can also result in overdone artiness that is nice to look at, but does not necessarily move the story along or help with short attention spans. Honestly, in some parts, I watched at double speed with the captions on.

Michael Thyer

The deeper they get into the greenery, the more ritualistic symbols start showing up (think 1999’s The Blair Witch Project). The closer they get to Pithole City, the more the vision become gruesome and extraordinarily gory and bloody (thankfully). Images of a cult killing performed by a hooded Zeke (co-director Nick Psinakis) show that the brothers may be in for more than they bargained for, than just mommy dearest.

Speaking of which, it comes to a question of be careful what you wish for (or, in correct grammar: for what you wish; but I digress…). When they meet up, mom is in a vicious cult (Satanic? Other god[s]?) of all women, with Zeke at its head. And why are there no males? Well, that is where the violence comes in.

Nick Psinakis

I will not go into details here, but needless to say, in the final act, things get a bit dicey for the brothers dos. I understand how people can get sucked into cults (e.g., the Manson Family, the Heaven’s Gate, Jim Jones’ The People’s Temple, Scientology), but why this group exists and how scarred Zeke keeps control, is a mystery to me. Maybe that is why I am an Agnostic Atheist?

There is also an interesting soundtrack, including Bluegrass banjo music soundtrack, which I personally really enjoyed as a fan of the style since forever, but seemed oddly out of place for the northern-based film. Other music is off-beat singer-songwriter and, yes, moody and haunting dissonant instrumentalizations. Nearly all of the music is the output of the co-director, Kevin Ignatius. In fact, this is majorly a family affair, since there are a lot of Ignatiuses and Psinakises scattered through the credits. I respect that.

There is also some playing with time, with jumps of minutes, hours, or even days. On occasion, especially near the end, this is a bit jarring, but it is not hard to follow, so that is a strong plus.

Briefly, there are some extras on the Blu-ray. The first is the “Behind the Scenes/Blooper Reel” (4 min); it is okay, but nothing spectacular. Next is a featurette with “Artist R.L. Black” (2 min). Narrated by co-director Psinakis, he describes how Black’s work illustrated part of the end credit. Black’s work, by the way, is fantastic. Then there is the mostly behind the scenes Slideshow (3 min), this film’s Trailer, and a number of Cleopatra Entertainment brand trailers.

The ending is a bit unsettling for me, and not the direction I would have gone if I was in the shoes of the participants. But it is possible that this has been left as a cliff-hanger, either opening up the possibility of a sequel, or leaving it open ended for the viewer to decide. If there is a part two, I would be interested in seeing it.

IMDB listing HERE

Review: Scorpion with Two Tails

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Scorpion with Two Tails (aka The Scorpion with Two Tales;
Assassinio al cimitero etrusco; Lo Scorpione a Due Code)

Directed by Sergio Martino
Dania Film; Medusa Distribuzione; Publikampus;
Full Moon Entertainment; MVD Visual
98 minutes, 1982 / 2022
www.FullMoonDirect.com
www.MVDVisual.com

Not to be confused with director Sergio Martino’s The Case of the Scorpion’s Tail (La coda dello scorpione, 1971)  there are some Italian giallo genre that gets a chef’s kiss, when talking about the A-line of the likes of Dario Argento, Lucho Fulci, Mario Bava, etc. However, as with every genre, there is also the B-films, of which this is one. That is certainly not meant as an insult, but rather a statement of fact.

John Saxon

Like many giallo films of the period, they had some fading stars from the break-up of the movie studio system, in this case John Saxon (d. 2020) and Van Johnson (d. 2008). Saxon’s role is more of a cameo, and Johnson’s was probably no more than a couple of day’s work, and are in the film more for name recognition to sell for the Western audience. That being said, I do not know if their roles were longer in the television version (see below).

This film was popular in Italy under the name Murder in the Etruscan Cemetery, but I am willing to bet dollars to donuts (Lira to ciambella?) that they changed the name to the Scorpion one, even though it might make one from this side of the Pond go “henh?”, but I bet some marketing team believed that Americans are not educated enough to look beyond their own borders, and figure out the meaning of “Etruscan.”

Etruria is an area of Italy when it was a group of Nation States, that is on the west coast about halfway down the “boot,” across from the island of Corsica. They had their own language and rituals.

Elvire Audray

Joan (Elvire Audray, who looks like Julia Duffy during her “Designing Women” years, d. 2000 at age 40) is a psychic who has a dream her archeologist husband, Arthur (Saxon), who studies Etruscan history, will fittingly be murdered in an ancient Etruscan death rite. Of course, unlike real life but prominent in Italian giallo, she has the shining, as it were. And being a giallo, some of those visions include maggots. De rigueur.

I was bemused when one of the opening shots was of Joan walking across Fifth Avenue in New York, with St. Patrick’s Cathedral behind her; I do get the idea: standard religion  (relatively modern) vs. fringe religion (then). It is pretty common for Italian giallos to be shot somewhat in New York, such as Fulci’s The New York Ripper (1982; quack-quack). It was nostalgic to see not only the World Trade Center, but also 5 WTC, the building where I worked for a number of years around the time this was shot. Many other scenes were filmed in Italy, deep in real catacombs, caves and cemeteries. While Joan is in my home town, Arthur is in the Etruscan ‘hood. Also, like many releases in this genre, the film is both spoken in English in parts, and dubbed into the language from Italian in others, depending on who is speaking. For many of the Italian actors, even the ones speaking English, they are dubbed over in that language. This is made a bit obvious in a scene with Johnson, where the people he is talking to sound normal (dubbed), and his voice is echoey, as he obviously did not sign up for dub sessions. 

Van Johnson, Audray

Thing is, while Arthur is the good guy, Joan’s father, Mulligan (Johnson) is a drug and antiquities smuggler, though she is unaware of that part of their lives. Following the fruition of her dream, Joan travels to Italy with a work companion who has the hots for her, Mike (Paolo Marco). There, they meet the wonderfully named Contessa Maria Volumna (Marilù Tolo, who I remember as the whip-wielding Conchita in the 1968 classic, Candy). The Contessa hosted Arthur when he was murdered at her villa. Also helping in trying to figure out what is happening is Venessa Hull (Wandisa Guida, who starred in numerous Italian Sword and Sorcery films in the 1960s; this was her last film), and Nick (Jacques Stany, nee Stanislaski).

Joan is determined to investigate Arthur’s demise, and of course, this being a giallo, nothing is as it seems and neither is anyone. Who is the good guys, who is the dangerous ones? What is the meaning of the titular piece of ancient jewellery? In the meanwhile, we get to see some really amazing ancient sites and carvings in their natural settings.

As Joan scopes out events and people are turning up dead (again, giallo), as we slowly but surely delve into criminal activity, psychic dreams, and possibly reincarnation (shades of 1932’s The Mummy!). This could have gotten away with just the smuggling story and still be giallo, but that there is a supernatural element is a bonus for my worldview (wheelhouse?).

Like an Agatha Christie novel, there are way more characters than seem necessary, making the story a bit convoluted at times. This tends to drag the story out a bit, as one tries to follow who everyone is, and how they are associated with the main plotline. I believe this is a way to produce red herrings and exposition, but it sometimes feels ponderous. Personally, I would have liked to have seen more of the supernatural element than the smuggling.

The soundtrack is perfectly moody and has strong ties to the giallo genre, with a score by the well-recognized Fabio Frizzi (who did the same for a number of Fulci films, and even recently with Nightmare Symphony in 2022).

Giallos tend to have some of the best and long titles, and this is definitely one of them. Also as in many giallos, much of the dialogue is fraught and at high drama (I call it Telenovela style), like it is something out of an Anne Rice book (an expository example: “He opened the door! He walked inside the room!!”). There is also the nearly mandatory assassin in a motorcycle helmet or mask. This would be carried on in giallo-styled films such as Maniac Driver (2020) and Nightmare Symphony..

Extras for the Blu-ray and DVD are a Deleted Scenes section (19 min), which contain parts that were excised for the television version; it is in Italian with subtitles, including Saxon’s voice dubbed into Italiano. Also included are a bunch of Euro Trash Trailers. Skimpy, but good. I just wish they included English subtitles.

This is the first time this has been released in North America on Blu-ray and DVD, obviously taken from the original print, as the occasional film “noise” is present. It is also not “crispy clean,” having a slight fuzz to the original (yet still better quality than a VHS, where I originally saw it decades ago). Full Moon said this version was, “taken from the best source material available.” Previously, this was an 8-part miniseries on Rai Television (Radiotelevisione italiana}, and was cut down to this film length before being released in Europe outside Italy.

One of the oddities I have found is the random Confederate flag in the home of photographer Gianni (Franco Garofalo; d. 2019). All that being said, this is a fun film, drenched deep in the giallo formula. Being a giallo B-film, that is more than fine as I have an affection for films below the “A” grade.

IMDB listing HERE

Trailer is HERE

Review: Condor’s Nest

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2023
Images from the Internet

Condor’s Nest
Directed by Phil Battenberger
MBG Films; Lost Galleon Films; Icon Film Distribution;
Voltage Pictures; Strike Media
102 minutes; 2023
www.facebook.com/condorsnestmovie/  
www.Strike-Media.com

German Nazis (as opposed to those who marched in Charlottesville and stormed the Capitol on January 6, 2021) living in South America have long been a trope…well, at least since the end of World War II, anyway. It has come up in the likes of the book The Boys from Brazil (1976) by Ira Levin and the film that followed (1978), and a particularly gruesome pilot episode from the anthology show, “Night Gallery” (1969) called “Escape Route.”

To give a bit of a background, in the real world, the German Condor Legion was a mostly-air force unit of Nazis who fought in the Spanish Civil War in the mid-1930s (thank you Wikipedia). While this has no relation to this particular film, which was filmed in Greensboro, NC, it explains from where the name originated.

Jacob Keohane

Basically, this is an action revenge film. As the trailer shows, in the extended prologue, an American war plane shot down in hostile territory, runs into a group of classic ruthless Nazis, led by SS Colonel Bach (Arnold Vosloo, who played the title character in 1999’s The Mummy and its 2001 sequel, The Mummy Returns). He brutally has the US crew killed, mostly by his own gun, with a lone survivor,

The main crux of the story takes place in various locales in South America, including Argentina and Paraguay, ten years after the events in the prologue, as the sole survivor plane crash, Will Spaulding (Jacob Keohane) is on a one-man revenge mission to kidnap, torture, and kill as many escaped Nazis as he can find while searching for Bach.

Arnold Vosloo

On a psychological and socio-political level, he is so full of anger and thirsty for revenge, he does not realize that he has become what he is hunting, on some level. He is so compromised that he is willing to lie to save a Nazi, Albert Vogel (Al Pagano), from justice to gain information on his target, but cannot see the paradox. He is blinded by his hatred.

When he and Vogel joins forces with Israeli spy Leyna Rahn (Corinne Britti) who wants to bring atomic scientist Vogel to Jerusalem to hang, the search heats up. It also does not help that even the Germans are trying to kill Vogel before he gets to Russia, led by the vicious Fritz Ziegler (Jackson Rathbone, who was Jasper in the Twilight “saga”).

Corinne Britti

Various enemies become compadres is a well-used trope and this uses it multiple times. There is double cross after double cross throughout the story, as Will sets to get Bach, who is hanging out with Heinrich Himmler (James Urbaniak, who played Robert Crumb in 2003’s American Splendor) in said Condor’s Nest, which obviously takes up Act 3 (you do not need a fortune teller or psychic to know this, or even a spoiler notice, as it is in the damn title, fer chrissake).

Held up in the Condor’s Nest (a really nice chateau) is an elite bunch of head Nazi’s planning the Fourth Reich, led by Himmler. Actually, the historical Himmler supposedly died in Europe and never made it to South America, but it works for the story, so why not, right? I mean, they said the same about Adolf, and he was “killed” in Inglorious Basterds (2009); poetic license is a beautiful thing.

Al Pagano

There is the high-action conclusion that is reminiscent of a Rambo film, or something with Schwarzenegger, or perhaps out of The Dirty Dozen (1967), a film I thoroughly enjoyed as a young’n. The film is full of violence, especially gunfire, but surprisingly very little blood nor, it seems, South American characters.

What it does have, however, is lots of cameos that include Jorge Garcia (who will always be remembered for “Lost”) as a bartender, Michael Ironside (1981’s Scanners, 1997s Starship Troopers, and so many great others), and Bruce Davison (1971’s Willard and the X-Men franchise). Even Vosloo’s role can be considered one, though he is one of the main foci of the storyline.

Bruce Davison (right)

Many social and political issues are brought up, such as a hatred for Jews, and the effects of revenge on both the revenger and the revengee, with the border between them a gray area (yes, they even use the cliché – and I’m paraphrasing – “We’re not so different, you and me”). Along with the action, this look at a culture of hatred, especially in the present political times, is also well handled. There is also a nice touch of Germanic mysticism and eugenics.

The scenery is stunning, from impoverished surroundings and historic buildings, to natural wonders likes rivers and forests. Even Peru’s Machu Picchu makes a brief appearance.

The actors are all on their A game, though Davison seems almost uncomfortable wearing the swastika armband, which I respect. I have to admit, I would have loved to hear him yell, “Tear ‘em up!” even if it was in German.

As for the director, Phil Battenberger specializes in war films, from the Civil War (the upcoming Without Consequence through Vietnam (Point Man in 2018). He handles conflict in interesting ways that makes the story compelling here, and keeps the interest without being over the top.

Condor’s Nest is available on iTunes, Amazon Prime, Google Play, Microsoft Store, Rakuten TV and Sky Store, and on disc in April.

IMDB listing HERE