Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror
Films, 2014
Images from the Internet
Jim Wynorski is in good company.
Although he arrived on the scene later in the game, starting in 1983, he
deserves to be included with the likes of Roger Corman, Dave Friedman, and
Hershell Gordon Lewis as purveyors of low budget and often transgressive cinema
that is designed for fun and profit on a micro-budget. Wynorski has used many
different directorial names (e.g., Sam Pepperman, Harold Blueberry) to cover
150 films within various genres, including horror, fantasy, exploitation and
sexploitation. What I am reviewing here are re-releases of his films by
Polyscope Media Group from the very beginning to the near recent.
The
Lost Empire
Produced, written and
directed by Jim Wynorski
Polyscope Media Group
Inc.
83 minutes, 1983 / 2013
The 1980s was to video indie micro-budget horror films what
the 1950s were to, well, cinema house micro-budget horror films. In the case of
the former, it was a new market desperate for new product to put on shelves,
and the two most popular genres for quickie flicks were porn and horror. Fed on
the big screen by the likes of the magic trio of Freddy, Jason and Michael, the
nascent direct-to-video (D2V) hunger produced many a marvellously wondrous WTF
fantasy world. This film is just one example of it.
I remember seeing this film on VHS back in the mid-1980s and
thinking it was a piece of shit. Part of the problem with D2V is that back then
it was rare to find letterboxing, which companies thought people would not
like. It’s not surprising, really, since nearly all televisions had square
screens and if a film presented was letterboxed, the image became really tiny.
And if you had less than a 19”-er, it was unwatchable; don’t let me get started
on foreign films and trying to read subtitles. They used a method called
pan-and-scan, which meant you only saw as much as a third of the screen at a
time. If two people were talking in one shot, it would flip back and forth
between them, and action scenes became as muddled as, well, the new Transformer series (aka, “what the fuck
just happened? All I saw was movement!”).
As televisions became larger and the quality of VHS gave way
to more defined DVD (etc.), The Lost
Empire became a lost film. It hadn’t made its way into the new technology,
leaving it in the lost empire of grainy and pan-and-scan dimension. Thirty
years later, Polyscope has given Wynorski’s early work a hand up, and have
re-released the film in full-screen, cleaned-up, theater-ready glory. But is
this film worth it?
Seeing it now again, after all these years, yeah, it was.
Sure it’s not a great film, but it sure as hell is a fun one. I see lots of
first releases by directors, and there are certainly problems due to small budget,
writing, and acting that tend to be consistent that even remain right this very
minute.
In the case of this film, it’s partially a feeling of “this
may be my only shot, so I better cram as much as I can into it at once”
(Wynorski confirms this on the commentary track). While it’s fun to play spot the reference¸ this can also lead
to clichés. However, sometimes – as in this case – there are so many, it
surprises you because you can never predict which
homage he will use. The biggest and most obvious are Enter the Dragon, Dirty
Harry, and James Bond, specifically Dr.
No.
The premise is tough cop Angel Wolfe (Melanie Vincz) – as in
savior / lone wolf – has a brother
who was a cop, killed during a hysterically funny and bloody pre-credits
robbery. She swears revenge when she learns that it was engineered by a sinister
group that has an island where they are training beautiful women to fight,
lured in by a large-prize contest. Leaving behind her porn-star looking
boyfriend, federal agent Rick Stanton (Paul Coufos, a future Wynorski repeater),
she sets on a path to investigate and seek retribution. Along the way she picks
up two more associates to help in her plan. First there is Whitestar (Raven
DeLaCroix, a star in Russ Meyer’s Up!
and at the time Wynorski’s girlfriend; she also rightfully earned a producer’s
credit here, a Native American who Angel once saved. DeLaCroix, who designed
her own cleavage-bearing costumes, is mostly Native with some Métis thrown in).
Despite her ample bosom, it was her blue eyes I actually found most beguiling.
Go figure. Last there is the gum-poppin’, prison-sprung Heather McClure (the
ill-fated Angela Aames, who would die of a heart condition not long after this),
who had been placed there by Angel.
The premise behind the plot is the search for an ancient
jewel that has mystical powers, and when combined with its twin already held by
the island’s “mastermind,” supposedly brings enough power to control the world.
Everyone is looking and killing for it, but it has a mind of its own. So the
three women, who often crack wise, set off to the island kingdom to seek out
and kick some cult butt, even before knowing about the gem, which ultimately
makes itself known.
That’s about as much as I’m willing to give away, storywise.
Let me say right off, that even though it was Wynorski’s first release (he has
at least one previous that has never been publicly released), it actually looks
quite good. Sure, some of the sets and matte painted backgrounds look a bit
like the first season of Star Trek,
but by using the Roger Corman playbook (and the Corman studio lot, among other
locations), he manages to make the most out of what he has. The SFX look really
cheezy, but unless you were at Lucas level, this is how most of it appeared for
indie films at that technological juncture. The laser machine at the end,
however, just made me laugh and laugh.
Despite his lack of directorial credits, there is actually a
pretty impressive cast of secondary characters that is worth noting. For
example, the villain (not giving away anything because it’s in the credits) is
the Tall Man himself, Angus Scrimm, chewing scenery his entire time on screen,
acting more with his eyes than anything else (squint…wide…squint…wide). Also
from the Phantasm franchise (there is
a new Phantasm scheduled to be
released in 2015 with the original cast!) is Bill Thornbury, who played the
older brother, and here plays Angel’s younger brother. Next up is softcore icon
Angelique Pettyjohn, known mostly for an episode of Star Trek as a fellow “thrall” with Shatner, here is practically
unrecognizable (to me) as a prison gladiator who wears a black leather dominatrix
costume that she peels piece by piece.
As a police captain in a short cameo near the start is
redheaded Kenneth Tobey, known mostly as the lead in the original version of The Thing From Another World (1951).
Then for an even briefer moment there is Tom(my) Rettig, who was the original
owner of Lassie in the first series
of the television show (1954-57).
One other notable actor is Blackie Dammett, the one person
who could out-scenery-chew Angus. I couldn’t remember where I had seen him
before, and after looking it up, it was from National Lampoon’s Class Reunion (1982). Considering the way he
overacts, it’s not surprising that (a) his last role was in 1990, and (b) he
will be better known through history as the real-life drug dealing dad of the
lead singer of the overrated Red Hot Chili Peppers. Man, is he a bad actor.
Wynorski had made some weird choices here. For example, no
matter what the occasion, everyone is going to be showing lots of cleavage. In
fact, when Angel goes to visit her brother in the hospital, she wears a shiny
gold one-piece that is skin tight and cut down to nearly the navel. Even on the
island, everyone’s hair is perfectly quaffed, and Angel’s changes from straight
to poufy to having ringlets. Apparently, even on an isolated island used for
women gladiators, girls will be girls.
Of course, in the story, there are so many holes, not even
counting the lead henchman (stunt man and real-life bully, according to
Wynorski’s commentary, Robert Tessier) and his ever-changing eyebrows. For
example, the shuriken (Japanese throwing stars) are way too thick to stick into anything, the three female leads are
constantly snarking at the island’s – er – management, as if the guards cannot
hear them, and they manage to sneak out of the facility a few times, despite
there being cameras everywhere, and more importantly sneak back, even after
there is reports of “intruders.” There is one character that has a broken leg (portrayed
well by Linda Shayne) in scene, and is walking around the next day.
Although it was “acceptable” at the time, in hindsight,
there is a lot of less-than-subtle racism floating around here. For example, a
Chinese character cameo is Charles Chang (yes, dressed identically to Charlie
Chan), played by occidental character actor Art Hern, with all the
stereotypical broken Engrish. For
DeLaCroix’s character, she is constantly using clichés (and remember, she’s
also one of the producers) such as, “Yes, kimosabe.”
She bares her overly large cleavage while wearing a Native headdress. As for
sexist, well, duh, that’s the genre, and that’s an enjoyable given.
While most of the electronic music is terrible, sounding
like many of the television cop show themes of the period (electric keyboard
going “ooo-wahhhhh ooo-wahhhhh”), it is hard to criticize it because it was the
style for the time. What is notable, however, is that some of the humor – and
there is a lot here – actually works. Groaners for sure, but bound to bring
either a happy “Oy!” or genuine
smile.
The disk has only two extras, a truly interesting commentary
track by Wynorski that confirms many thoughts I had while watching the film,
and a silly “stills” track that is merely screen grabs from the film itself,
rather than during shooting. However, it was nice to see one shot of Shayne’s
fate that Wynorski discusses but is really hard to see while watching the movie.
Looking back, this film is actually important in a way, in
the larger scheme of things. It is a time capsule of a particular style that
propelled the home-grown market in a time when even low-budget films had to be
shot on film (in this case, Cinemascope!), and be opened to a greedy market
that was in a sometimes painful growth spurt. Though I did not like it when it
was first released, I can now appreciate it for what it was, and especially for
what it was trying to be in the cultural arena.
Directed by Jim Wynorski
Polyscope Media Group
Inc.
91 minutes, 2012 / 2014
Gila!
Is actually a made for television (Sci-Fi Channel) remake of
the 1959 low-budget monster film, The
Giant Gila Monster. It was part of the popular subgenre of supersized
creatures, such as Them!, The Giant Behemoth,
The Killer Shrews (made by the same group that did …Gila Monster), Gorgo, Konga, and even Gojira.
In an very similar storyline, also taking place in 1959, a
bunch of 30-year-old teenage hotroding friends discover there is a dinosaur
sized poisonous (though this aspect is never used in the plot) Gila Monster
roaming around their Texas-based, Indiana shot town. The head of this motley
crew is hero Chase (played with gusto by Brian Gross, currently starring as
Kirk on the Star Trek: New Voyages
series) and his best gal is girl-next-door-with-a-smart-mouth Lisa (Madeline
Voges). If this were a western, Chase (what else would you call someone who
races hotrods?) would definitely be wearing a white hat, though he’s so
goody-goody, it would probably be white bread. He makes Steve McQueen in The Blob (1958) look like Marlon Brando
in The Wild One (1953).
Chase’s nemeses (i.e., the “black hat”) would be the stereotypical
JD type “Waco” Bob (Jesse Janzen), who is a short-tempered, woman-abusing thug that
spent three years in “juvie.” His squeeze is the hot Carla (Christina DeRosa,
who looks like a rounder version of Alyssa Milano), who of course has the hots
for Chase. While she is also cartoonish, Christina actually manages to make her
into a fuller (no pun intended) character, which is actually a large
compliment. Like most of the roles, hers is written quite two-dimensional,
though she successfully gives her some nuances. She is also the one who
supplies any form of sex appeal, with or without the cleavage and self-butt
slaps.
The other two main characters are the local Sherriff
(veteran actor Terence Knox, who was a regular on St. Elsewhere, among others; you’ll probably recognize his face,
especially if you’re over 30). He’s sort of a substitute dad to Chase, who has
a mother and baby sister suffering from the after-effects of polio, but no
father.
As with previous films, Wynorski has managed to dig up some
aging teen actors who look well beyond their years, and yet for some reason
makes me happy (that they are there, that is). First up is the mayor’s wife, played
by Julie McCullough, who infamously was future religious fanatic-tea party
spokesperson-asshole Kirk Cameron’s steady in the Growing Pains television series. The wife is kind of a harpy, but
her character sort of disappears after one scene. I was waiting for her to be
swallowed whole, as that’s how they set up the tone. But more important (to me,
anyway) is Kelli Maroney, who was in one of the only soapers I watched, Ryan’s Hope, and in such classics
(seriously) as Night of the Comet (1984)
and Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982).
She’s the deputy who doesn’t fare as well as McCullough (hey, it’s in the
trailer). The coup d’état though is getting Don Sullivan in a minor role. Who
that, you ask? He was Chase in the original …Gila
Monster.
The monster is, in this case, caused by toxic waste hidden
in a cave. The townsfolk have to find the scaly critter and get rid of it
before it can lay eggs, which makes me thing about Lena Dunham’s comment about
having, “like, a thousand follow-up questions, such as…” how do they know it’s
female (i.e., does a male Gila monster have a dangling participle?), and
doesn’t there need to be another that size for it to mate with, which means
there would be at least two? There are lots of issues I have, but I believe
this has more to do with the four (yes, four) writers more than
director-for-hire Wynorski.
With an estimated budget of nearly a million buckerinos, I
can think of so many micro-budget directors who would have been able to create
much better effects for half that amount. I’m guessing most of the money went
towards the CGI monster itself, but the CGI blood, CGI explosions, CGI
feedings, CGI car crashes all look more 2002 than 2012. Perhaps1992. I will
have to say, though, that there is a couple of really good face meltings toward
the beginning of the film, which appear more appliance than graphic.
One of the highlights of the film is the soundtrack, which
includes a number of rock and roll classics by the likes of Bill Haley and the
Comets, the Everly Brothers, Dion and the Belmonts, and even the true king of
rock and roll, Chuck Berry. There are a couple of decent original songs and a
mediocre cover of “Fever” (using the pre-Peggy Lee-added text).
The best of the extras are the trailers for both this film
and the original. The rest of them are kind of meh. There is a slide show, a text description about the original
film, a text narrative of Drive-In culture, and the original recording of Don
Sullivan’s “Mushroom Song” (with lyrics) from the first film. I like the way
Wynorski does commentaries, but there is none here, again I am assuming because
he didn’t write or produce.
So, do I recommend this? Yeah, without a doubt. Sure it lags
in parts, but it is a fun escapist nonsense that has a relatively decent sense
of humor when it wants, the acting is purposefully juuuust over the top, and the monster is, well, huge. Now if he can
only bring back Traci Lords, like he did with Not of This Earth (1988). Oh, wait, that’s right, he is, in a new
feature called Sharkansas Women’s Prison
Massacre, due later this year.
