Review: You’re Melting!

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2022
Images from the Internet

You’re Melting!
Directed by James Balsamo
Acid Bath Productions
60 minutes, 2022
www.jamesbalsamo.com
www.facebook.com/acidbathproductions

Yeah, so I basically begin nearly every review of director/writer/actor/etc. James Balsamo’s films the same way every time, so to condense it: auteur, (usually horror) comedy, extremely prolific output of work, Balsamo’s narration, shots from an airplane, full of bad but enjoyable puns, female nudity (which is okay because nothing personal, I really don’t need to see Balsamo’s naked bod, as he is always in his films, much like Mel Brooks, another filmmaker I love but do not want to see in that way), animation (both Claymation and cartoons), lately Bill Victor Arucan, and tons of cameos. And yet, I am always happy to get to see his work. Some of these listed above are bound to crop up in my comments, but they will all be in the film.

For this relatively short opus, Balsamo plays Nathan Ender, a plastic surgeon who is out for revenge by killing all the other plastic surgeons as “The Witch Doctor” (i.e., a masked killer). On his trail is Detective George Skully (Arucan) and his assistant, Heather Gummer (blue-hair-tinted bodybuilder Ria Papageorgiou); we see them interview 1980’s-1990’s star Jennifer Rubin, who plays Ender’s co-office surgeon. Along with the killings, there is a lot of gratuitous nudity and dancing, which is to be expected in a Balsamo release, of course.

While the revenge premise of killing plastic surgeons is quite clear, the film has a bit of a cobbled together feeling, which is both good and, well, a bit weak, especially for a film this short. For example, there are a few mostly or totally nude dance sequences that really are gratuitous and does nothing for the story with either two or three women strippers and in one case a male (the latter is actually better at it). Yeah, I know these will probably show up on one of Balsamo’s anthology Sexy Time series (and rightfully so).

Joe Estevez

There is also a ridiculously long sequence of three surgeons (including one played by Joe Estevez, brother and uncle of other better-known actors, playing Dr. Richard Smothers – where’s Tom?, or was he named after Smothers’ son, porn actor Dick Smothers?) walking in a circular path through a Chinese...I’m not sure…Museum? Art gallery? While this happens, the three riff off (ad lib) nonsense that does not promote the story at all in a woe-is-me fashion, or just screaming dialogue. That being said, the “Where’s Waldo” effect with the Witch Doctor in this sequence is cool.

I am also confused about one of the dancers on a ritualistic altar as the Witch Doctor runs a (cool looking) knife over her body. Is she supposed to be a plastic surgeon as well? It is incongruous with the story, especially with her smiling as the knife skims her naked flesh. Then there is the topless dancer who sings and plays the piano for what seems like a really long time. See, this is why it feels cobbled together rather than an actual narrative story.

There are some interesting cameos here and there, such as Brian Bonsall (the younger kid in the TV show “Family Ties” and the Klingon youngster in “Star Trek: The Next Generation”), wrestler (always a wrestler) Tonga Fifita reading poetry, and bizarro filmmaker Jim Wynorski (I like his films), among those I have already mentioned among quite a few others.

And what was the reasoning for the stop-motion monster further on in the film? The story was left quite open, I am assuming for a sequel at some point, as Balsamo has been doing that a lot lately.

I have a theory: the Witch Doctor is actually played by Bobby Canipe Jr., under the mask. The cinematography is by Cagney Larkin. Balsamo’s actual role is a miniscule cameo and the rest is voiceover. So, what I’m thinking is that this film was directed over the phone (or Zoom) by Balsamo, but it was mostly produced and edited by him and shot while he was away making multiple other films. That would explain the inconsistencies and weirdness of whatever was going on in the plot, such as it was. This was more an idea than a story.

While not the strongest of the Balsamo releases that I have seen, and I have watched quite a few – nearly all I enjoyed – there are some good elements to this, especially the set designs and I like the Witch Doctor mask. Despite all my quibbling, I am still looking forward to some of Balsamo’s upcoming releases, such as The Righteous Adventures of Commander Star Shark and Guppy!, It Wants Blood 2, and especially I Got a Bullet with Your Name on it!, among a dozen others that are currently in pre-production, production, or post-production.

IMDB Listing HERE 

Trailer is HERE 

Review: Lake Michigan Monster

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2021
Images from the Internet

Lake Michigan Monster
Directed by Ryland Brickson Cole Tews
Arrow Video; MVD Entertainment
78 minutes, 2020
www.arrowfilms.com
www.facebook.com/lakemichiganmonster
www.facebook.com/ArrowVideo/
www.mvdb2b.com

Let me start off by saying that I am straight-edge, and have been longer than the age of many people who are reading this. My history with drugs is I smoked pot about a dozen times in my teen years, and tried coke once when I was 22. Never really a drinker, I probably had the equivalent of a six-pack or two a year. I don’t really like the taste or feel of alcohol, so I gave them up, too. The reason I bring this up is because this film is a trip-and-a-half.

Beulah Peters, Ryland Tews, Daniel Long, Erick West

Almost like a Terry Gilliam fever dream, we are introduced to Capt. Seafield (director Ryland Brickson Cole Tews) who explains that his dear ole dad was killed by the titular creature, and gathers a crew together to find and kill it. There is snarky weapons expert Sean Shaughnessy (Erick West, Ryland’s friend), Sonar “individual” Nedge Pepsi (Beulah Peters, Ryland’s girlfriend), and former Naval Officer Dick Flynn (Daniel Long, Ryland’s childhood friend), or as Seafield calls them, “The Team of the Century.”

There is more to the cast, but many of them are actually related to the director, such as his father playing his pirate-clad brother Ashcroft (Wayne Tews, who wrote and sang the theme song, and also created a lot of the cool props), and his 87-year-old grandmother playing his wife, Martha (Lucille Tews). The cool-yet-chincey-in-a-good-way looking sea hag monster is played by the director, Ryland, that looks a bit like the titular The She-Creature (1956).

Of course, things don’t go as planned, as if there were a real plan, though that not-real plan gets played out more than once, leading to a mutiny of sorts. I will not give away much of the story, such as it is, and will instead revel in its insanity. Through what looks like it may be Paper Mache masks, scenery and monsters, along with the graphics, Tews’ vision is brought to life, in its own twisted world within our world.

There are some amazing set pieces, mostly either on or under the water, in Milwaukee (beer plays a key role in this, as should be, as beer could be what made Milwaukee famous), the North Point Light Station (lighthouse), or on the Lake X-press ferry. The whole third act’s setting is ridiculous at best, which is part of what makes its charm.

The film is shot in contrasty and grainy black and white with “film scratches” added in to “age” it. Even so, there is a lot of animation work going on; when it was filmed it was with a green screen to add texture and said computer graphics.

There are three ways to watch this film. The first is get shitfaced and to just mock it like you’re on “Mystery Science Theater 3000”; have a blast! The second is to see it straight, pay attention to the humor and catch the lines the stoners are bound to miss, and feel righteously smug (my category). Third is to just think it’s a stupid mess and turn it off after five minutes as you would with the likes of Monty Python and complain that “SNL” hasn’t been funny since John Belushi left.

Perhaps this is the evil plan for the first feature film for the four-named director to take over the world, by using a cast whose first acting credit is as a member of the Team of the Century. Sort of a human version of Python’s “Confuse a Cat” sketch. For me, I found it quite amusing, knowing I would be watching it again to dig for the jokes I missed, and I’m guessing there are a few. There are some influences here and there, some discussed during a commentary, such as Guy Maddin, and there is a bit of the good Capt. playing checkers with a ghost a la Ingmar Bergman’s The Seventh Seal (1957).

The Blu-ray is heavily loaded with bonus materials, as is wont with Arrow Video. It starts with three commentaries: two with the cast and crew (same group, but one while sober, the other drunk) featuring writer/director/actor Ryland Tews and actors Daniel Long, Beulah Peters, Erick West and editor Mike Cheslik. For the sober one, the group is self-depreciating while being informative and quite fun with each other; it is easy to tell they got along quite well, even as they sling insults around. There is a bit of talking over each other, but mostly it works and worth a listen. The “drunk” one is recorded the same day, so there is not much more info, and yes, they are drunk, but not sloppily so. Surprisingly, it remains somewhat amusing thanks to their camaraderie. Honestly (and I will always be honest with all youse), I was planning on seeing about half of it, but ended up watching it all the way through.

Another features Australian critics Alexandra Heller-Nicholas (an academic who specializes in genre gender politics and has published numerous books on the topics) and Emma Westwood (writer and film historian). What is nice about this is that rather than the dry kind of academic analysis, which is common on these things, is that these knowledgeable women approach dissecting the film more like a knock-hockey table in that they carom (as Ed Norton might say) back and forth between using film theory and a sense of joyous goofiness and self-reflection that is appropriate to this specific film.

Others include an “Effects Breakdown” (10 min) comparison of the film’s third act. Using four images, they show how the green screen is used to composite the scene, and the storyboard it is based upon. Really fun, including storyboards and pre-composited footage. Then we get a humorous (of course) music video by the Seafield Monster Sextet (led by Wayne Tews) of the Captain Seafield theme song, “Dear Old Captain Seafield” (5 min). It’s almost a karaoke version, as it’s mostly made of the lyrics, which is a blast.

There are three sets of interviews at film festivals: “Interview in a Cabin” (9 min) with Ryland Tews and Daniel Long at the Fantasia International Film Festival (Montreal) on Fantasia The Talkshow and the after-screening talk, “Interview in a Bar” featuring the cast and crew at the Beloit International Film Festival (Wisconsin) on Fest Track for SIRKtv (13 min), and the audio-only “Interview by a Fire” (24 min) with Mike Cheslik on Mark Borchardt’s Cinema Fireside radio show from Milwaukee, though Mike is in California at the time. All three are interesting and worth the listen.

The first season of “L.I.P.S” (22 min) and pilot episode “Ozanzigwan: Agent of L.I.P.S.” (7 min) from 2016, is Ryland Tews and director Mike Cheslik’s hybrid animation and live action sci-fi comedy web series. Tews plays Ozanzigwan, a not-too-smart but hyper-vain process server who gives out subpoenas, trying to break the record. It is some live action people over crude, SpongeBob kind of art if it was simpler and Cubist. It tries a bit too hard, but you can see the genesis to The Lake Michigan Monster mindset. With the pilot, Ozanzigwan and his partner are more stoic, seemly based more on the “Dragnet” series.

Along with the theatrical trailer and a behind the scenes photos, there’s a short on “5 Tips for Independent Filmmaking” by Tews, as the Capt. (3 min). While it’s done facetiously, there are useful kernels of truth in it. Also, a very brief and funny bit on a “Manufacturer’s Guarantee” (1 min) that there is a monster in the film… or is there?

On the physical side there is a reversible sleeve featuring original artwork by Jade Watring and newly commissioned artwork by Colin Murdoch, and if you manage to get the first pressing, there is an Illustrated collector’s booklet featuring a new article on the film by writer – he has multiple books on genre films – broadcaster and journalist Barry Forshaw.

It took me three happy days to watch the film and all the extras. This would be a great double bill with spiritually out there by-the-beautiful-sea cousin Subferatu (2020; reviewed HERE), which would make a great double bill some rainy night in Georgia, or Wisconsin, or anywhere else. 

 

Review: To Your Last Death

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2020
Images from the Internet

To Your Last Death (aka Malevolent)
Directed by Jason Axinn
Coverage Ink Films
91 minutes, 2020
www.facebook.com/ToYourLastDeath 

 Animation sure has changed since I was a kinder, watching cartoons at 24 hand-drawn frames per second, like Bugs Bunny (my childhood hero, but I digress already…). In the late 1960s, it went down to a clunky 18 frames per second, with cartoons such as “Scooby Doo,” “The Jackson Five” or “The Nanny and the Professor.” Many of these cartoons looked alike due to it’s cel framework (the medium is the message, posited Marshall McLuhan). 

With computer animation, it opened up a whole new world to what was possible, Whether extreme detail or simple line drawings, the field burst open. That is where this film comes in. The animation here looks a bit like a cross between anime (e.g., Akira) and Britain’s 2000AD comic line (they do Judge Dredd). It is minimalist when it comes to movement, but that gives it more of a comic book look, which I really liked. Some of the backgrounds tend to be pretty amazingly detailed here. 

 The storyline is basic, but with some unusual twists that elevate it quite a bit. An evil billionaire arms manufacturer, Cyrus (voice of the Ray Wise), who is a cross between Donald Trump and Lex Luthor, calls his four estranged adult children in for a meeting.

There’s the hero of the story, Miriam (Dani Lennon) who has gone the charity route for peace in diametric philosophy from Cyrus and has had mental issues in the past, Ethan (Damien C. Hass), an aspiring musician into sexual asphyxiation, Kelsey (Florence Hartigan) that has a sad life of a trophy wife to Cyrus’s biggest rival, and Colin (Benjamin Sieman), a mini-version of Cyrus’s business ethics, but is rejected by dear ol’ dad because he’s gay. 

Perhaps inspired by the short story or films, “The Most Dangerous Game,” hired mercenaries – one voiced by Bill Moseley – turn this shindig into a battle royale in a life or death struggle. The implements used sometimes are reminiscent of the later Saw franchise, where the victim is asked to complete a horrendous task, or dum da-da-dummm. 

But there is a whole ‘nother layer added to the story. Some interplanetary gamblers are betting on who will live and who will die. Like the gods in Clash of the Titans (1981), they sit around a table and watch the goings on below. The busty being running the room is the Gamemaster (Morena Baccarin). She can manipulate time and influence the players. It’s kind of like a video game gone gore. 

 Yes, there is a lot of blood and gore in this one (and one bit of nudity), and even for animation, it looks pretty decent. Lots of cool weaponry are used, including an armored glove and a long sword. And don’t get me started with the elevator…

And to give a “Star Trek” opening-like voice over in a nicely done though over emoted cameo is none other than William Shatner, himself. He uses a similar tone as when he “sang” Elton John’s “Rocketman.” 

As for extras, their press release states, “Each Blu-ray purchase will come with a redemption code to over 4 hours of digital extras, including: an audio commentary with director Jason Axinn, a Zoom panel with Axinn, star Dani Lennon and others, an interview with star William Shatner, interviews and behind the scenes with stars Morena Baccarin, Ray Wise, Bill Moseley, Dani Lennon and Florence Hartigan, a behind the scenes reel, comic con panels, an animation demo with lead animator Mohammad Ali Sharifpour, unused artwork and animation, crowdfunding highlights, featurettes on the development of the film, and more.” As what I watched was a screener link, I cannot comment on these, but they sound interesting. 

 I quite liked this film, from the comic book-style animation to the quirkiness of the story, in which time is played with, including a few Groundhog Day repeating moments. The recurrence of history with different choices is a trope that has been used a bit recently, such as Inoperable (2017), but director Axinn makes it feel fresh by not just repeating, but mixing up the storyline (or as Miriam puts it, “They keep changing the goal posts”). 

Because of these time shifts, people are killed and/or they aren’t, or die multiple deaths. And all of them in different means of disposal. The unpredictability is part of what makes this even more intriguing. The whole gameplaying with these super-being gamblers was a nice touch, and luckily, they only interfere with the story on occasion, so it doesn’t break the tension. Of course, the Gamemaster pops in and out frequently throughout to work her malevolent magic, which enhances the story, because it is hard to really predict what’s going to happen next. 

 What I do know is going to possibly happen is that, given the ending, this can be a franchise and the gamblers face new murderous stories to play the game. I am so okay with that.

Review: Night of the Living Dead: Reanimated

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2018
Images from the Internet

Night of the Living Dead: Reanimated
Curated by Mike Schneider, directed by George Romero
Wild Eye Releasing / MVD Visual
101 minutes, 2009
www.Wildeyeleasing.com
www.MVDvisual.com
www.Notldr.com

Julie Andrews could have sung, if her tastes were more similar to mine, “music and horror and comics and White Castle / These are a few of my favorite things.” Okay, so the first and last of those are not the focus of this review, but the middle two are, with joyous abandon.

The assumption here is that if you’re reading this review, you’ve seen George Romero’s groundbreaking 1968 zombie classic, Night of the Living Dead, most likely more than once, if not more than 10. It’s familiar, comfortable, and still a pleasure with its angular neo-Germanic Expressionism, and black and white images. Remember the first time you saw it? I have a clear memory of cutting high school in the early ‘70s and going by myself to the Walker Theater in Bensonhurst (now a Mandees store). It was a double Halloween bill, but I have no memory of what the first piece of crap was, though I certainly remember the three hood wannabes behind me who kept kicking my chair between loud, open-mouth breathing (in just a couple of years they would probably be wearing polyester and medallions, and hanging out at 2001 Odyssey Disco). By the time NOTLD was over, as the second feature, we were all sitting together.

That was the first time I viewed it, but hardly the last. There have been a number of remakes, even by the same team, but none have – or can – live up to the original. But like the zombies, it keeps rising up again and again.

Night of the Living Dead: Reanimated takes a new twist on a now old concept. Previously there have been reissues of films where the dialog has been replaced by something totally different, such as Woody Allen’s spectacular What’s Up Tiger Lily? (1966), and serials from the ‘40s being given the treatment by Firesign Theater. Well, Reanimated takes the opposite approach in two directions: first, they use the actual soundtrack and change the image, and second, this is totally respectful and not a spoof at all (though there are moments of humor, such as one zombie looking a bit like GW Bush).

Here is the concept: Mike Schneider sent out word over the ‘Net via horror Websites to artists for their input to animate the film by any means necessary. With contributions of over 150 individual pieces, he took this work and connected it to the original film. There are still images and animated sections, including line drawing, EC-style comics, Ren & Stimpy type caricatures, claymation, Barbie dolls, computer game styles (including Grand Theft Auto and SIMS), stop-motion photography, puppets, and even a few Ferbies thrown into the mix. While this sounds like a hodgepodge from hell, it actually works fantastically, possibly creating a new subgenre.

For the still pix, the camera rolls over them giving some sense of motion, and there is hardly a moment where your attention is drawn away (no pun intended). The contributed work is all over the map, some of it quite conceptual and abstract, while others are obviously adapted from the actual film frames (a good example of this is the multiple shots of the same frame of Bill Hinzman, the first zombie seen in the opening cemetery scene – he’s coming to get Barbara – at the car window). All these images and styles are put together like a series of museum pieces (which is possibly why Schneider lists himself as “curator”), but in a constant flow.

This is all done for the love of the art and the film, as those who contributed were not paid to do so, but each is given full credit at the end, and often in the bonus features. Speaking of which, this release is chock full of extras, including animated shorts, great obscure trailers (for Wild Eye films), extended unused scenes, an introduction by horror host Count Gore De Vol, a panel from a horror conference with many of those involved with this project, and two very interesting commentary tracks. The first one deals with the film and this version of it in an almost philosophical bent without being anywhere pretentious (the “art” of the art, zombie cinema, etc.), and the second is how it all came to be in this film, and how the production team created the final outcome). I sat through both without being bored at all.

If Reanimated is successful, perhaps there are other public domain films that can be given this treatment. Of course, it would need to be one that has an audience that has seen it numerous times, enough to get what is going on at any particular time… which brings me to one minor quibble about this release. I would have loved an option to be able to turn on the original version of the film in a smaller window, perhaps in a corner, to compare them. But hey, what the hell, it’s a brilliant concept that is put together in a cohesive albeit jumpy way as it goes from style to style, but it is never distracting to the story.

This is a true homage to a classic piece of cinema.

This review was originally published in FFanzeen.blogspot.com

Review: Mécanix

Text © Richard Gary / Indie Horror Films, 2016

Images from the Internet

Mécanix

Written, directed and edited by Rémy Mathieu Larochelle

Ofilms / Avant-Gore Films / IPS Films /

Unearthed Films / MVD Visual

70 minutes, 2003 / 2016

www.unearthedfilms.com

www.mvdvisual.com

Many cities have arthouse theaters. In New York, we’d head down to those like the Film Forum on West Houston Street, occasionally watching real life art going by such seeing rats running down the street as we went into the theater (happened more than once).

Along with the Scandinavian films that would depress a hyena (which SCTV lampooned so well with Whispers of the Wolf), we’d also see films that were certainly not conventional in any way, such as those by Richard Kern, Kenneth Anger and Stan Brakhage’s Dog Star Man (1964). Occasionally there would be a Canadian entry, and some were quite innovative, like the shorts Pas de Deux (1968) and Neighbors (1952), which we saw together in revival form (hey, I’m not that old).

Human

The genres of avant-garde and transgression are different, but they can overlap, sometimes quite extensively, occasionally blurring the lines. The Montreal-filmed Mécanix can be seen as just such a film. But, of course, it’s open interpretation. In an interview segment included as an extra, the director also mentioned German Expressionism, which was at its height during the silent period with the likes of Nosferatu (1922 by F.W. Murnau) and Metropolis (1927, by Fritz Lang). Similar to that style, there is very little dialog (more on that later) until the final act, though there is a lot going on here, especially visually.

Non-human (goat creature)

Metropolis is actually a good comparison point because of some of the similarities in themes (though the resemblances kind of end there). The story, from what I make out, is about a world split into two strata. The first is the lower class humans who service the overlords. The second is the creatures who rule the humans, which consists of mostly animal-like puppets and pixilated clay beings of a mostly rudimentarily shaped type (though the goat one is quite cool looking). Like Metropolis, part of the plot is the human’s trying to overcome by… well, it is confusing as it’s a bit philosophical, quite fantastical and poetically opaque. It’s also about, as stated during the film, “The desire of all things.” Note that the film is in Quebecois French with English subtitles, though as there is so little speaking, it’s not like the viewer is going to spend much time reading.

Speaking of the story, I’m going to do something I’ve rarely done before, which is repeat what’s on the box (in part), because I had trouble following a narrative:

…The last human beings are forced to be the slaves of the strange creatures that rule this strange world. There is only one thing these beasts fear – the embryo of the universe: the origin of everything … is hidden in the last freeborn man. The scientist helping the beasts must vivisect every human on the planet to stop this embryo from growing and destroying it forever.

What interests me, as a media theorist (that’s right) is the hinting of both the works of French philosopher Jacques Ellul and Toronto professor Marshall McLuhan, whether intentional or not. McLuhan tends to be thought of as dreading the inevitability of the takeover by technology, but it was actually Ellul who posited that theory (beware!) in his seminal book, The Technological Society (1964). He described what he called Technic, or the way things are done; for our film here, the term used is Mécanix.

In Understanding Media (also 1964), McLuhan theorizes how technology is an extension of humans (e.g., cars are extensions of the legs, pens are extensions of the hand). One of the stop-motion creatures even states (whispering soto voce) to the central character: “Mécanix are the extension of your being, like you are an extension of nature.” In actuality, though the humans are here are the extensions of the creatures, helping them get fed (though it seems like they always refuse the food), and to try and find the “embryo.”

Both human and nonhuman

The motion of the creatures is jumpy (you do what you can with your equipment), especially considering this was done with 16mm film rather than digital. There is no computerization used (anti-technology, or just what was available?), which is admirable. In fact they use the same technique/technic for the mixture of animation and living actors that they used in silent films. This is explained in the interview extra.

There are some really nice moments, like a beastie who interrogates the main human character has his snout wrapped in wire, and before he asks any question it unwraps and a ball of wire falls from his maw. After each query, the ball goes back into his mouth, and the wire wraps it up again. Larochelle designed and built all the puppets and animation creations, and also pixilated them, which took about half a decade.

The image of the film is murky, like the Yellow River: muddy dark brown and a bit hazy at times. But it is not as convoluted as the narrative. I’m not saying this as a negative, but if you’re looking for light and airy fare, or a blood feast, this may not be where you want to be searching. However, it is interesting cinema in its artistry, and in its sheer labor (oh, wait, it’s Canadian… labour), considering the filmmaker was just out of college.

Included as its only extra (not counting the chapters) is a single camera 30-minute interview with the director and a producer, Phillippe Chabot. The prewritten (but previously unread by them) questions were handed to them on a sheet of paper that is held during the taping. About 50 percent of it is interesting, but when it is and they are taking it seriously, it had my attention.

I’m glad this is getting a new release, because works like this deserve to be in the film canon, and I certainly hope at some point Larochelle releases a follow-up of some kind (does not have to be directly related to this), because he shows he has a head on his shoulders with this dark almost-poetry and definitely philosophical allegory. That being said, I also hope he actually adds a commentary track on the next reissue to further explain what he was meaning by the actions on the screen.